DIALOGUES [I]
*
talking recently
to sasha eidinov
i said
- emigration is now not
a question of
living standards or even regime
but only of climate
- climate, yes
he nodded
our words froze
nearby
right up in the air
*
- you don’t have
enough impressions
she said
i mean
real ones
- maybe
i thought
i go out
too rarely
we were just sitting
in the darkness
silently
one more day
was coming to its end
*
- as our years go by
he asked
does life expectancy
increase
or decrease?
she thought
that a question was put
in a wrong way
and said nothing
he thought
she didn’t want to talk to him
he made a reach for her
touched her face
they looked at each other
as if they had no idea
about what
was happening
*
- the point is
he said
not to forgive mistakes the point
is not to forgive anything
they were looking at him
as if he’d said something filthy
then she said
- you’ve really gone
downhill since you’ve been living alone
- i still can’t get used to it
he reached for the empty pack
and crushed it
then he took an ash-tray
and went to the kitchen
- i shouldn’t have said that
he thought shaking out the butts
it’s unforgivable
i shouldn’t have said that
*
- the past
she said
is everything for us
no matter
what happened there
- the future
she continued
means nothing to us because
we can’t write
about it with enough
certainty
- yes he agreed
and the present
something’s always wrong
with it somehow
- past is everything
Jean-Marc repeated inwardly
future’s nothing
what are they talking about?
- it’s kinda absurd
i thought looking at them
shaking the ashes off
the cigarette
what are they talking about
- all the same
she wrote ending a letter
same shit no matter what
no matter how
everything’s all the same
*
- friday?
oh, no
i answered
- something wrong?
she wondered
what happened?
- no i thought
nothing
i just don’t wanna see
anybody again
- no i said just a little
technical problem
after i’d hung up the phone
i thought
- funny
but it’s true
i lay down on the couch
turned my face to the wall
not at once
but it managed at last
to start crying
at the point
where i’d left it
Translated by Stanislav Lvovsky and Nika Skandiaka
*
talking recently
to sasha eidinov
i said
- emigration is now not
a question of
living standards or even regime
but only of climate
- climate, yes
he nodded
our words froze
nearby
right up in the air
*
- you don’t have
enough impressions
she said
i mean
real ones
- maybe
i thought
i go out
too rarely
we were just sitting
in the darkness
silently
one more day
was coming to its end
*
- as our years go by
he asked
does life expectancy
increase
or decrease?
she thought
that a question was put
in a wrong way
and said nothing
he thought
she didn’t want to talk to him
he made a reach for her
touched her face
they looked at each other
as if they had no idea
about what
was happening
*
- the point is
he said
not to forgive mistakes the point
is not to forgive anything
they were looking at him
as if he’d said something filthy
then she said
- you’ve really gone
downhill since you’ve been living alone
- i still can’t get used to it
he reached for the empty pack
and crushed it
then he took an ash-tray
and went to the kitchen
- i shouldn’t have said that
he thought shaking out the butts
it’s unforgivable
i shouldn’t have said that
*
- the past
she said
is everything for us
no matter
what happened there
- the future
she continued
means nothing to us because
we can’t write
about it with enough
certainty
- yes he agreed
and the present
something’s always wrong
with it somehow
- past is everything
Jean-Marc repeated inwardly
future’s nothing
what are they talking about?
- it’s kinda absurd
i thought looking at them
shaking the ashes off
the cigarette
what are they talking about
- all the same
she wrote ending a letter
same shit no matter what
no matter how
everything’s all the same
*
- friday?
oh, no
i answered
- something wrong?
she wondered
what happened?
- no i thought
nothing
i just don’t wanna see
anybody again
- no i said just a little
technical problem
after i’d hung up the phone
i thought
- funny
but it’s true
i lay down on the couch
turned my face to the wall
not at once
but it managed at last
to start crying
at the point
where i’d left it
Translated by Stanislav Lvovsky and Nika Skandiaka